Saturday, 27 August 2011

5 Things I Have Learned This Week:

1: There is always one. And sometimes, astonishingly, it's not your one.

2: Ten-year-old girls should not order off-menu, demand extras and additionals and then not eat any of it. It is irritating. Oh. And expensive.

3:  I can sensibly discuss my father-in-law's testicles with said father-in-law at one o'clock in the morning without sniggering. But not for very long.

4: A heavy week of entertaining various visiting relatives can result in one's consumption of gin increasing enormously. *Reaches for bottle.*

5: I have no idea if chickens can fly.

Tuesday, 23 August 2011

My Life with Jedward

THERE comes a time in every teenage girl's life when she develops a crush on a popstar. Generally it lasts for about six months ... just time enough to plaster the bedroom wall in posters, play the CD wafer thin and drive every sentient being within hearing distance into a mummified state of pap-pop induced terror.

But Twin2 has developed a passion that just will not be thwarted and that passion is Jedward. Since they first, well not graced.... Since they first appeared on the stage at the X Factor auditions in 2009, she has been totally besotted.

Jedward: The Lego Years

Wednesday, 17 August 2011

In Praise of Facebook

When I was a teenager any angst I harboured was spewed in suicidal poetry that was torn up and discarded shortly after. Every broken heart (and there's been a few), I cradled to myself and let fester. Every disappointment was stifled somewhere deep down where it lurked, shiftily, for years. I wouldn't have liked to have been my mother but to be honest, my mother didn't like being my mother either.

So as a mother of a couple of teenage girls now, I could kiss the feet of Tim Berners-Lee and lick Mark Zuckerberg all over (though I really wouldn't enjoy it, honestly).

Social media, and Facebook in particular, has given me a window into my daughters' lives I value enormously and not in a sneaky Daily Mail way either. I don't spy but I do get given an insight into their lives that I wouldn't be privy to if we just gathered around the dinner table every evening.

Sunday, 14 August 2011

Silent Sunday

The Boy running through a fountain

My Harry Potter Shame

I HAVE a confession to make, one that could see me banished from civilised society. A monumentally dark and shameful secret. Hush, don't tell but...*deep breath* ... I have NEVER read a Harry Potter book and NEVER, EVER seen a Harry Potter movie from beginning to end. There I've admitted it.

I've seen clips, course I have. Adverts on the telly, obviously. I even have a rough grasp of who's who and a vague concept of some of the plot. But let's put it this way if Chris Tarrant's million pound question was about Harry Potter's world, I'd be coming back home on the bus.

Saturday, 6 August 2011

The Son and Hair

WHEN The Boy was born he had nothing but a faint white down covering on his head. It rubbed off and hair grew. Slowly. Very, very slowly.

Now he's five years old and the hair that grew has grown more. And more. And it continues to grow. Now he has tangled fair curls that grow ever longer and unruly. I've done a bit of trimming mainly to make it fall better and keep it out of his eyes but NOT to intentionally shorten it. It IS me that can't bring myself to take him to a barbers and ask for "a short back and sides." Me too who worries that if he did have a buzzcut, his fine hair would disappear into a couple of tussocks.

I like it long. We're a long hair family. Daddy has longish hair, mummy and three sisters: long hair. We can block a plughole in one overnight stop. We're a hairy and mostly curly family. What can I say.

The Boy and Hair

But we've reached that time of his life (his hair is touching his shoulders.. A bit) when some relatives have started to make snide Little Lord Fauntleroy remarks when they think I can't hear them (I can). When an old man down at the allotment called him a girl.

A Girl? He is so much a boy he practically leaks testosterone. He has hair and it's not as it's even loads and loads of hair. A serious rock fan would be embarrassed by it to be honest. What is with you people? *Growls*

But I had to ask him if he would like to have his hair cut. He said he didn't.

At least, not yet. *Sigh of relief*

Thursday, 4 August 2011

Fun And Laughter On Our Summer Holiday...

I'VE reached THAT point of the school holidays where I have no idea what day of the week it is and I've gritted my teeth so much my jaw aches.... though at least that means I've not shouted my throat red raw. Yet.

Things That Have Made My Teeth Gritted So Far:

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