Thursday, 24 May 2012

Boys Will Be Boys ...

Picture the scene, if you will. It's home time at school. It's one of the first truly hot sunny days of the year and the parents hanging around the school gates are having a chat, smiling and ACTUALLY laughing because everything is so much better when the sun comes out. EVEN the people at the school gate you wouldn't throw water on if they were on fire.

And through the school doors, smiling hugely, slightly sweaty and his hair damply tousled emerges The Boy. The teachers, over-seeing the home time handover, are grinning, other mothers are smiling. And I see my boy's uniform top in all it's awesome Before-The-Washing-Powder-That-Works-Miracles grubbiness exposed to the world.

You would think there were limits to just how appallingly dirty one small boy could GET a small yellow Aertex shirt while at a suburban school, but if there were, The Boy has clearly surpassed them. No mining, grubbing around in the earth for worms, or rugby match required.

One slice of chocolate cake in your lunchbox: Essential.

For this is, mostly, the devastation wreaked by a slice of chocolate cake.

"Did you actually eat any of it?" I inquired. Politely, for there were people who were watching.

And he had. The devastation wrought was from the debris ,and the really chocolately bit on the sleeve was where he'd wiped his mouth EVERY TIME HE TOOK A BITE. (I know this because one of his sleeve-tugging schoolfriends was eager to apprise me of the details).

One mother paused to sympathise about just how terrible boys were. And I'm sure she was only beaming at her own child sporting that bright, white shirt by accident. Of course I am.

The Boy didn't care though because his teacher had kindly awarded him a prize for his lunchtime endeavours. He, amid the mud, grubbiness and grime, proudly sported a sticker proclaiming; "I cleaned my plate" .....

......Which they're probably still laughing about in the staff room, occasionally pausing to gasp: "With his shirt."



  1. How funny, but how lovely that the teacher gave him a special award. I bet all the kids will be wiping their little faces on their shirts tomorrow.
    Brilliant post xxxx

  2. Haha I love it! I always say that a dirty child is a child who has had fun :)
    ps visiting from BYOBH- sorry I'm late!


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