Saturday, 8 September 2012

Things I Have Learned This Week.... The Going Back To School Edition

Going back to school IS supposed to be educational but probably, for the parent, not entirely in the way it's supposed to be. Here are a few of the things that I'VE learned this week..

1. It doesn't matter how many options meetings, discussions with teachers or forms (lots) that have to be filled in to make A level choices, it's not until the first hour of the first morning of the induction day of Sixth Form that your child discovers they can't do all the options they picked anyway.

2. Although the words: "And this is your Never-To-Be-Used-Unless-In-Case-Of-Emergency money" leave my lips, when they land in the 11 year old's ear they become: "You should spend this money on sweets daily." For the first week I will do this every day until I think: "Hey, hang onnnnnn...."

3. The day I remember to ask the Class Two teacher what day PE is, is the day it has been PE.

4. I can rant and yes, chunter *hangs head in shame* for three hours solid because the 11 year old's first piece of homework from secondary school is to "Write out and Illustrate the Health and Safety Rules." .......*Rolls eyes*

5. When I decided that we really should get the 11 year old a smartphone because she's at big school now and "EVERYONE else already has one MUUUUUM," I was ACTUALLY performing elementary Cyborg surgery.

6. That even though I like to interpret the non-glasses-wearing TeenTwin's desire to wear glasses on her sixth form ID card as a statement about women, intelligence and stereo-typing, I secretly know it's because she's a Hipster. *Sighs*

7. That if you give a child a uniform, they put on an attitude..... *11 year old stomps off and shouts "Fine" for third time this week*

8. That little, niggling worry that the TeenTwins being in Sixth Form means having them hanging around the house all the time is entirely unfounded.... *watches tumbleweed roll silently across TeenTwins bedroom* AND Sixth Form hasn't even properly started yet.

9. The VERY best time for the TeenTwins to say that they require not one, but two copies of Twelfth Night for Monday morning is generally about 8.30 on a Saturday night. *nods wisely*

10. Sports socks are the most elusive member of the Sock world. *Reaches for harpoon*

*hushed whisper in the manner of David Attenborough*
"An elusive, lesser spotted, higher ribbed Sports Sock, the youngest of it's tribe, caught in the act of escape."

What have you learned this week?


  1. Ah yes. Now I know why there's been a complete change from chilled-out mum to stress-bucket this week - I remember all that stuff well

  2. And then the notes start - just when you think you have all under control! I've had insurance (incase my child breaks bones or worse at school), mass, choir, swimming, drumming & dancing!! x


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