Friday, 20 December 2013

Hotel Chocolat.... A Review

We have been asked to review a box of chocolates, a box of Hotel Chocolat's Sleekster Classic Christmas Selection chocolates. This has caused great happiness and consternation within the house of the Quirky Kook, to be honest.

TeenTwin2 was happy because she has a "twitter-relationship" with someone who works in one of Hotel Chocolat's chocolate emporiums in somewhere and was on telly once. She tweeted about the programme, he favourited it, she favourited him back, or whatever, and now she can taste some of what he's selling. 


And yes, I am slightly worried about that, but ....

Everybody else was happy there was chocolates and that I wanted them to eat the chocolates. That doesn't happen often, my relationship with chocolate having been frankly soured by years of continual chocolate-based disappointment (The Galaxy Counter was NEVER that small and don't mention Creme Eggs *tuts*).

I don't, if asked, say I eat chocolate, though sometimes I do because I'm a woman and it's the law or hormones or something. But when I do eat chocolate, I am always disappointed. Chocolate, I think sadly, is not what it used to be and then hanker back, nostalgically, to the days when chocolate was chocolate, thick, creamy, rich and an explosion of, well, chocolate. I was probably seven years old. 

But, purely in the course of research and review obviously, I had to eat at least one (or two*) of the Sleekster box collection. And,well, let's just say I was not disappointed. And not only is it thick, rich, creamy and an explosion of chocolate, there's an extra added firework display of flavours...

*pulls up ankle socks and gets skipping rope*

The rest of the family reviewers weren't disappointed either. After the unseemly gorge fest that ensued when I, finally, held out the designed-to-fit-through-a-letter-box-box** I garnered opinion like a proper reviewer...

TeenTwin1 liked them. She was astonished at the existence of chocolate that didn't, well, clag your mouth up. (What? We're from Yorkshire) She was going to have another but restrained herself politely. TeenTwin2 liked them so much, she kept quiet and snuck an extra chocolate instead. *tuts* ...........No-one dare tell TeenTwin1 and now we live in constant fear she may find out.

The Tween liked them too. There was hopping and skipping, smiling and even a little bit of jumping. The next time I want to lure the Tween away from Minecraft, I will be employing a  Hotel Chocolate Cranberry Cup, and that's for sure.

... And now you're wondering what caused the consternation of course? And that'll be because we won't be eating Hotel Chocolat chocolates EVERY DAY FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES FOREVER...


* most (because I'm the biggest)

**Ideal as a last minute Christmas present for your favourite blogger #justsaying

Disclosure: We were (very happily) provided with a box of Hotel Chocolat's Sleekster Classic Christmas Selection for review. All opinions, words, photos and chocolate smeared mouths are our own.

Friday, 13 December 2013

Bah Humbug ...

I'm in my annual bah humbug phase of December when Christmas is looming around the corner but the three month run-up has already f.f..festived me right off.

I am DONE with people asking me whether I'm all ready for Christmas. I'm not. I never am and I won't be until about 4am on Christmas Day morning when I've wrapped the last present and danced the dance of the nervous stocking dropper. And not in a good way.

I tell those that ask I'm ready though, even the ones who ask before the end of November when I would much rather heft an axe from my handbag by way of reply. What? Do you expect me to have a Christmas reality meltdown in the middle of the shop, supermarket, bank, park, on the bus and/or at the schoolgate? Really? Of course I lie.

And I hate shops at Christmas, all the shops, and I hate supermarkets. I particularly hate supermarkets. I start hating these, to be fair, around mid-September when the Christmas fare hits the shelves but as the festive season hoves ever nearer, the staff take to wearing santa hats, antlers or artfully arranged bits of tinsel. And they smile! Sometimes some of them even look like they mean it, but as they've been listening to a continuous looped tape of Bing Crosby crooning about a White Christmas for a solid eight hours every day for three months, they're probably just borderline psychotic.

Not as psychotic as some of the customers though. There are places that are safer to be than a supermarket the weekend before Christmas; in a war-zone, on an erupting volcano, in a zeppelin with a slow puncture or on the Titanic for example. And the queues to escape the Titanic were probably shorter than the one to the checkout too.

And I hate Mulled Wine... it's warm wine. WARM. WINE. What the merry fuck is that all about?  And turkeys. They can't give them away for most of the year, but come December they're suddenly the most precious foodstuff in the market, worth their weight in gold and priced accordingly. For that price, I want a turkey that get's itself up at ridiculous o'clock on Christmas morning and flings itself into the oven, perhaps only stopping to peel the potatoes and slice the parsnips on it's way in. But does it? Does it f....

And breathes....

I will be spending the intervening time between now and Christmas looking for my festive spirit. I suspect it may be in a bottle of gin. Or two.

Saturday, 7 December 2013

The Croods .... A DVD Review

The Croods was a blockbuster hit in the cinemas when it was released in March this year but we, who have to plan taking our family of six to the local flicks based on whether we have a spare limb to sell or not, missed it when it was on the big screen unfortunately.

Fortunately, Mumsnet came to the rescue with an advance copy of the DVD, which is released on Monday December 9, for us to review. And so we've spent a rainy afternoon variously snuggled on the sofa, the floor and against the radiator (as I said there's six of us) enjoying the luxury of a totally new film to watch.

Sunday, 1 December 2013

NRM York, Santa's Steam Adventure .... A Review

I have written, often and with exasperation, about the family adoration of all things steam engine. But this weekend, on yet another trip to the National Rail Museum in York, The Boy's engine related excitement was (very nearly) eclipsed by the news we were also going on the NRM's Santa's Steam Adventure.

Santa? And steam engines? The Boy, whose annual Christmas film of choice is and always has been The Polar Express, was practically beside himself with joy.... but not so beside himself he didn't insist on a visit to the Great Hall and a peek at his favourite steam engines when we arrived. *rolls eyes*

Silent Sunday

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